Showing posts with label Scofield. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Scofield. Show all posts

Friday, November 26, 2010

A Letter to Blizzard About Trees

Dear Blizzard,

      I would like to discuss tree of life form for resto druids with you. And before I start crying and whining (which is bound to happen) lets talk about some stuff. Lets talk about druids.
     Raise your hand if you think shape shifting is one of the cooler aspects of being a druid.
(hundreds of thousands of people raise their hands)
     I think even your developers would tend to agree with that statement.
     Now another amazing quality of druids is their diversity. They can literally fill every role in the game. And to accompany these specs are unique shapeshift forms for said roles. The increase in stats you get from each form is nice, I will admit, but not necessary. You have already proven that healing as a tauren is just as effective as healing as a tree. But my objection is so much more then just stats. Stats can be compensated for. This too can be fixed, easily I might add, but we'll get to that later. How would a feral druid feel if he ran into battle as a tauren and started beating things with his staff? In what world would shred or mangle be a staff attack? In what world would you feel any satisfaction out of a swipe bear claw going through the air coming from a cuddly cow?
     "But people want to see their armor!" is what I keep hearing. Bears don't get to see their armor. Cats don't. Boomchickens don't! And who cares about boomchickens anyway? Why not just take that away too, so they can see the shiny new armor? Because you know better. You know everything I just said and then some. About why you cant take away bear or cat form. And to be honest, I'm not even entirely sure why you left moonkin form alone. It actually wouldn't be as impractical for a cow to rain laser beams down on an enemy.
     So let me see if I got it right so far....resto druids can see their armor, but they're the only spec that can do so while in combat without losing, well...their class in the process. They can still become a tree but its a cooldown....and it looks like a tree, mixed with a person, with down syndrome, but you can glyph out of the ugly tree form, cause well, it's ugly. Is that about right? Never mind the other three specs who maybe want to see their armor. Never mind the people who, like me, felt that being a tree was half the fun of being a druid healer! I know its not just me. There are whole forums dedicated to protesting the loss of it as well, so I know its not just an isolated incident among my friends. Never mind the ridiculous amount of outcry. just stick with it Blizz...
     And now after all of the bitching and moaning, if you're still reading, it is time for me to offer a solution to this apparently insurmountable challenge. I cannot take credit for this one though. It was actually something so simple that only the writers of The Simpsons could've thought of it.

Blizzard: Tree form for all!
Masses: BOOOOO!!!!
Blizzard: OK then, Tree form for no one!
Masses: BOOOOO!!!!!
Blizzard: Hmmm. Tree form for some, miniature American flags for all!
And there was much rejoicing
Masses: Yaaaayyyyyyy!

     And that is the answer, in a nutshell. Such a small thing a glyph is. It gives the player choice. To tree form, or not to tree form? That is the question. At least that's what some poncy dude in a wig said. Don't ask us this question though...let us ask it for ourselves. Let us decide if we'd rather look like a tree running around, or our new Tier 11

P.S. Maybe offer this choice to boomkin. Maybe.
Sincerely,

Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Origins of Scofield

And a shaman was born.

The details of how I became a shaman are fuzzy but I do know that I wanted to heal things. We didn’t have like any in the guild at the time. I know sad story. Everyone knows the grind. Starting area. Barrens. Tarren Mill, more Barrens, more Tarren Mill.
Oh hey a WC run. “What do you mean its bugged? What does that even mean??” You have those “Where the fuck do I go now?” moments. Those “holy shit that’s a lot of quests!” moments.

1.[Hinterlands] Scofield:LFM for jinth’alor. Pst.
1.[Hinterlands] SomeDbag:you don’t need a group anymore nub. L2 read your patch notes dumbass
1.[Hinterlands]Scofield:its noob dude

You are now ignoring SomeDbag.

Fucking trolls. Theyre non elite but fuck there's so many of em. Oh shit there's a caster. Oh shit. Run aw…fuck I'm dead.

You have died

Release. Reincarnate

Oh snap I'm back! More lightning bolts!!

You have died

Release

Stupid pats….

[SameDbag] whispers: LOlOllol. Stupid nub. Go die some more. Im so l33t I can solo this whole place.


I thought I ignored this douche muffin…Oh hey it’s "a"instead. Clever…

You are now ignoring SameDbag

Same shit, different day as they say. We’re gonna fast forward to 70. I'm in karazhan. Nuggs is taking beatings from prince to the face like a good tank. Sam's healing on Sean's pally. Man why did it have to be 2 new healers on this run? Infernal NOT good! Shit run!

Nuggs has died

FUCK.

Fast forward a few more weeks. Greater heal. Greater heal. Earth shield. Greater heal. Pass out the loots.

[Nuggs] whispers: hey dude have you ever thought about going elemental? We got plenty of healers now and no one on this server ever runs elemental.
[Scofield] whispers:not at all lol. But im open to ideas.

Now I have this gift. When I spec a character 9 out of 10 times its exactly how Elitist Jerks and such say are the best. That little one out of ten though? That little guy? I wouldn't worry about that little guy. Sometimes Elitist Jerks gets it wrong. No ones perfect. The reason I tell you this is cause when I say down to make an elemental spec, it was game over. I never felt so satisfied with every spent talent point. Never questioned one single point.

Its Tuesday. Karazhan time again. Ok wtf am I doing here? Ok lightning bolt that looks important. Chain lightning, ima need that on trash pulls. Shock hmm what shock. Well earth always did the most but fire has a dot. Undead horses oh shit. Chain lightning. Flame shock. Lightning bolt. Iightning bolt. Lightning bolt. Earth shock. Ok, I could get used to this. How much dps am I doing? 200. Hmm. That not good. Maybe if I didn’t miss every other lightning bolt I could do more. I need more hit rating in my life. Now this marks a huge moment in my wow career. The day I fell in love with hit rating. The most useful stat you could every ask for. I had a buddy named mo who used to say “Fuck hit man, I can get an extra blah blah spell power out of it and yadda yadda crit.” “Yeah mo but you cant crit if you don’t hit the target.”
Poor show Mo. Poor show…